Don’t just assume this will be important or relevant or anything. It’s 3:00am and I literally just awoke from a strange dream and felt like sharing it.

I was… Somewhere. Can’t remember where. Often, I was in a supermarket with my best friend from school, Jess, and my best friend from university, Nick, attempting to sing along to the oldies that were pumping over the speakers. There was lots of Dusty Springfield, and at one point we sang the entirety of ‘Ignorance’ by Kasey Chambers, musical-style, I.e. without the music in the background.

As we sang these scenes were intercut with moments showing men attempting to break into a building. Apparently everyone was doing it, but they were all still trying to keep it a secret. Anyway, I can’t recall what the wanted, but they managed to swing through some large windows and into the large house and complete their task. Occasionally, when they would be most dangerous, zombies would appear, reaching up to try and grab the thieves but always failing. They would only ever be on the outside, and never actually got anyone, but they’d come when someone slipped from their harness and had to scamper into the nearest broken window. Otherwise the zombies were forgotten.

Back in the supermarket, my friends and I finished our singing and ordered pizza, along with everyone else in the supermarket. This meant that we had to worry about making sure we received the right pizza, and not some random’s weird order. Not only that but there was a homeless man who had his heart set on taking our pizza. I’m pretty sure it was the guy from the ‘How To Catch A Kangaroo’ video. Anyho, our order was ready and we ran across the pizza-eating shoppers and retrieved it, only to realise he’d gotten there first and scattered our slices throughout the other pizza boxes lying around. For some reason getting them back was no real problem, and once we had it all back we sat down and ate our food – without soft drink, I might add.

Once we finished Jess and Nick left, with the latter going to visit his son (Nick doesn’t have a son that I know of), while I rushed off to aid the men trying to break into the house for the second time. Same men, same house. The zombies were back sometimes too, and every time we swung across to the window we’d have to cling on silently as people strolled by, so as not to get caught. At one point one of my co-thieves impaled his skull on some security spikes, but he was alright and we moved on. We finally managed to swing into the right window, but as we held onto the metal bars Nick came around the corner with a small child. At first he didn’t notice us as we hid in the darkness, but eventually he stopped, looked up at us and said – with a smile – ‘I’m just visiting my son’, before turning away and walking down the street, the child climbing all over his shoulders.

This appeared to be the climax of my dream, and having completed the story my brain decided it was time to wake up. And now, feeling like I missed out on the soft drink, I’m going to go get a glass of lemonade.