In this lectorial we talked about institutions and how they implement themselves in our society. Focussing on marriage as an institution has made me question the things I’ve been told about it already. As it turns out marriage is not about love.

Recently my cousin got married, the wedding was beautiful and of course so was the bride. I watched as the crowd lined up to sign custom made wedding photobooks. Perhaps I’m rude for even wondering but why do people spend so much on their weddings days? Surely if its the “happiest day of your life” it would be just as nice going out for a cute picnic with the family and having a dressed down bbq. At least that’s what I would do. When I go to weddings I find myself secretly estimating the cost of catering and decor and wondering why? Is marriage for the couple or for the show? Either way it feels like an obligation to create highly stylised, sophisticated weddings nowadays. Modern couples higher photographers and at the wedding I went to there was a professional film made during the day and shown that very night at the reception. Couples are finding new ways to get creative to make their wedding the most aesthetically pleasing day of their lives.

Weddings have a striking influence in pop culture inspiring a countless array of rom coms. 

And in all of them, getting married seems to be a women’s ultimate goal and often the 30-something-year old feels that the world has ended if the heavenly gates of marriage threaten to close on them; banishing them to singleton island.

Generally wedding flicks seem to focus on the woman but in the past that was hardly the case.

I’m sure we’d all like to see marriage as a beautiful covenant of love and romance.  Marriage ceremonies from a historical perspective show that they really had nothing to do with love, let alone equality. Marriage as an institution developed principally out of political and economic needs; the protection of assets; exchange of wealth; a geographical foothold, even!  Whether or not the two people would even get alone was totally irrelevant. Sadly, love-marriages happened to just a lucky few. 

Marriage used to be a business deal between the father of the bride and the groom. The standard father daughter walk down the aisle then the traditional placement of the daughters hand into the grooms by the father symbolises the long sexist history.

Maybe one day I can add my own flare to a wedding through the trimmings of the placemats of the reception but for now I’m hoping to live with 7 cats and own an ice cream business alone in the outback.