I’m going to let you know a few simple truths about me (oh jesus, here we go…) I’m stubborn, defiant and I butt heads with everyone and everything for no reason other than -I’m an asshole. so when faced with the task of writing this blog for a uni assessment, my first knee-jerk reaction was to hate the entire concept of it on principle. to not take it seriously. to see it as work and dread doing it, to look down on it. to roll my eyes, resent it and write fluff (and as little of it as I could get away with) just to get me marks. something funny began to happen though around the time of the second lecture, when I figured out that I was going to use this space to talk about mental health…I actually began to enjoy writing again. not only did I enjoy writing, but my brain became instantly flooded with ideas, sentences, titles… whatever. as I’ve already said, I really love writing. given the right topic I can write effortlessly and incessantly. as I kid I used to sit at home when I was bored writing stream of consciousness (not that I knew such a thing existed at the time, but that is, essentially, what it was) dribble just to have something to type. I can pull out boxes and boxes of letters and documents I’d written to fictional people just to prove my point. so being able to express something which is constantly on my mind is actually kind of an amazing thing and doesn’t feel like a chore. not only that, but my head has already started to feel clearer. as a musician I know that music brings amazing catharsis (particularly writing lyrics) but I never thought that experience would translate that across to writing articles. for so long I’ve been thinking I’ve been blocked up creatively and haven’t had anything to write about… yet here I am, realising that the most meaningful and sincere thing I can write about is staring me straight in the face… and that, my friends, is a very exciting prospect for a pessimistic, unenthusiastic person such as myself. to genuinely feel the pull of something and the uncontrollable need to write.

this blog is not intended to be a self-help book (but who knows, it might help you). it’s not filled with positive mantras, coping strategies and happy thoughts. I am not claiming that I know all of the answers, that there is a magic fix that works. what I can offer is a different take. some things I have learnt. some things I have failed (and am still failing) at. nothing here is the ultimate truth, just one person’s experience. as I’ve said, we are all at different points in our journey, and this is mine. maybe you identify with it, maybe you don’t. as much as I’m hoping this will reach out and touch someone I am being realistic in saying that this blog is as much for me as it is for you.