Roosters and Red Tape

I distinctly remember the first time I decided to  do something with a camera that went past the “play  with” mentality. Coming from a photographic background, my Dad felt it necessary, sometime after my 9th birthday, for me to have a camera. It was at that time that I  decided to make a film. The film had a  simple premise. It was about  a  rooster. But what made this rooster special was its tendency to attack anyone who strayed too close. I soon organized a crew; my two sisters, and we made it. The grammatical emptiness of that last sentence wasn’t (in this case) due to my hopeless writing skills; it accurately described the entire process with  great detail. We just made the film. It was as simple as that.

Screenshot from the film

We spontaneously decided it would follow the structure of a three-part adventure film ,  spontaneously decided that the garden was the jungle,  that our home was the hotel that we stayed  in the  film. And last but not least, we spontaneously got attacked by a rooster for our  art. And to be honest… it worked.

But sadly those good old days are over, and to be honest I’m thankful that  it’s considered  the opposite to  how anyone anywhere should  make a movie. But  after a brief reminisce,  I begin to  wonder… If I was going  to  make a  film  now about tracking down a dangerous animal, what would I do?

1. The first thing I  would  probably do  now is complete a risk  assessment. Sounds pretty boring, but I have to say, when  dealing with a feisty  bird,  safety should come first.
2. I would ask my parents if it was ok  to  film  such dangerous antics in  the front yard.
3. I would plan what location would look best? Should I  frame the shot to make things look  more wild? This would eliminate the possibility of accidently having the house in one of the  ‘jungle scenes’ (whoops)
4. I would also get my sisters to sign  a release. And I know what you’re  thinking… “but they’re  family..?” well,  I  just want to make absolutely sure that they are ready and willing to be in the vicinity of a deadly bucket of KFC… just in case they want to  sue.
5. Finally, I would  give someone a call who actually knew something about roosters… maybe the RSPCA,  just in case I was messing with its migratory route or some insanely incriminating craziness like that. Just kidding. Roosters don’t migrate… they hibernate under the snow.

So you  get the idea. Maybe it was acceptable once upon a time to go  rogue and film  with questionable practice. But those  days of carefree endangerment of human life are sadly over. Well…unless you’re talking Norwegian cult films.