so, i’ve been a bit behind. i could try and blame uni but really i don’t even know where my time has gone. but the new tv season has been in action for two weeks now and i haven’t watched anything yet!! (shock horror!!!) but don’t worry folks, i’m catching up and my soon to be long list of reviews is kicking off with the season premier of survivor, it’s 400th episode (and the second one too coz i watched them both at the same time).

so lets get started. “blood vs water” is  the 27th season of survivor and incorporates a number of new twists, the major one being that the teams will be comprised of returning players and their loved ones. but, when they arrive on the beach, the contestants are told that they will be playing against their loved ones, on opposite tribes, so that one team is all returning players and the other is all their loved ones. now, here’s my first peeve with this twist, it means that the whole “blood vs. water” title doesn’t make sense!!! because A: there is no water (unless you count in the now over usage of water challenges). its just there because of the phrase “blood is thicker than water”. but, some of these aren’t really even blood. i mean, tyson’s girlfriend? really. they couldn’t get a relative. they could potentially have only known each other for like two months or something.

second. its not even blood vs. water. for that to have happened, it would have had to be 10 tribes comprised of jsut each pair of related contestants. which of course could not have worked because how can two people vote someone out. they could have brought in entire families to play against each other so do like 4 teams of 5 relatives but again, who would want to vote out their family members. so instead what we have is blood vs. blood and a bunch of water thrown in on top. i just don’t get it. you know what i want, a season with no returning players. not only that,but no hidden immunity idol, no redemption island, no non existent reward challenges. just plain and simple survivor the way it used to be. go back and watch season 8, the first all star season. it is survivor at its best and has none of these crazy twists we have today.

but, onto the game itself now. first off, it was so rough to vote someone out straight away. i mean, yeah, it is survivor, but that’s still really harsh. i know it was obvious that they weren’t gonna be eliminated but i still felt bad watching these people get voted off their tribe before the game had even started. however, i thought that the twist would be that they would swap to the other tribe (which would have made rupert very happy to have been with his wife) but instead you heard me and my whole family groan in disappointment with the return of redemption island reveal. look, it was interesting when it first started (not good, just interesting) but i’m over it. you don’t want to spend an entire season watching someone struggle by themselves out there to be either beat out at the last chance or make it back into the game be be eliminated straight away because they’ve made no connection to their tribe. and the redemption island challenge is the poor man’s reward challenge and to be frank i’d rather have the latter. combined reward and immunity just lacks fun and spirit

the first challenge was your typical survivor challenge. go in the water, retrieve some bags, get back to shore and complete the puzzle. yes, we’ve had a lot of them, but after 27 seasons, i can understand it. and it was a good challenge, the tribes seemed evenly matched. that was, until we all learned Gervase can not swim. which was both sad and fun to watch at the same time. now, i’m not trying to sound racist, but it seems that every season, the big black guy with the huge muscles is the worst in physical challenges. i mean, gervase could barely make it past the second obstacle and struggled heavily the rest of the way. and does anyone remember russel from a few seasons ago who simply could not climb that ladder out of the water? it just always seems like the guys with the biggest muscles are the weakest links in the challenges.

and then, after almost collapsing from his 100m swim, gervase was the first to absolutely rub it in the other team’s face that they had lost. and this caused a big problem on the other tribe. thats another thing with the new family twist, that even when you win a challenge, you can’t be happy because your loved one may be sent home because of it. and so gervase rubbing a huge amount of salt in the opposing teams wound led them to vote out his loved one, marissa, purely out of spite. now, i feel bad for marissa. in no way did she deserve to go home, she was great in the challenge. it was just unfortunate circumstances. and when gervase found out the next day at redemption island, he could not have cared less that his actions had eliminated his loved one. but hat was another problem with this set up. while most people had their wife, or husband or daughter (or even brother), marissa was gervase’s niece. i mean yeah, it’s still family, but you’re not gonna feel as strong a bond with them or need to protect them as you would your spouse or child. here, blood was definitely not thick enough because it didn’t seem like Gervase could have cared any less that marissa had been eliminated.

on to the next note worthy mention from the opening two episode, Colton. now, i still don’t know how to feel about colton. he is great television to watch. he’s funny, he’s interesting, he’s pretty devious. but i’m still finding it hard to get over the things he said last time he was on the show. some stuff was downright horrible and terribly racist and the worst was that at the reunion he didn’t seem to regret any of it. and you could kinda see that in these episodes where he claims he wants to redeem himself but within a day is already falling back to his old ways.

but yes, this does make for great tv and great drama. but from what we’ve seen so far, he’s looking to become the brandon of this series. flying off the handle one second, then going completely remorseful and emotional the next and then planning everyone else’s eliminations the moment after that. i just don’t think we can handle another unstable character. and from the ads for next week, it doesn’t look like things will be getting any better. and he seems way too dependant on his boyfriend (who does seem nice by the way. i can’t see them lasting if he starts to see this evil side of colton).

i think that just about covers it. oh, and marissa clearly has no idea what a blind side means. because she knew she was on the chopping block. she did a semi attempt at a scramble but not really coz she wasn’t sure. but if jeff is literally addressing the fact that you are a specific target in tribal council, how can you not know that you’re on the chopping block. not a blind side, i’m sorry. yes, it was unfortunate and shouldn’t have happened but still, not a blindside. i’m just waiting for tyson to vote himself out again by accident. that was one of the best moments of heroes vs. villains.

in conclusion, who do i think will win? hard to say right now considering almost all those guys look the same and there are three on the loved ones tribe that i still can’t tell apart, let alone tell you their names. but right now i’m thinking it’ll be candice (if she can get back in), aras or his brother vytas (who’s name sounds like fetus), or maybe… actually, i don’t know. and i prob shouldn’t give more than 3 guesses anyways.

so, let me know what you think, what are your predictions. what do you like about this new season, what do you hate? until then, see you next week 😀