This week was our last workshop for Media One! As a group, Jaie, Mikayla and I listened to our one minute rough cut and showed Hannah as well. Hannah gave us feedback at the start of the workshop and we then edited it once more before the panel arrived. We cut some of the content and added more to create more atmosphere for the introduction.
Hannah enjoyed our piece much more with this improvement and we felt confident going into the panel.
We appreciated the feedback Catherine gave us. She said that the introductory musical piece was too long at fifteen seconds and told us to replace the modem dial up sound with an R2D2 sound, suggesting that the audience may not know what a dial up sound is as it’s generational… We kept it in but moved it into later in the piece as we talk about the Internet and fandoms. Everyone in the group had heard that sound before and felt it added texture.
Catherine suggested we use more voices rather than just Jaie’s and we took this into account later in the piece and let Mikayla and myself talk.
The piece is quite nostalgic and Catherine said we should play on this and provide triggers for peoples memories who watched Star Wars as children.
Catherine gave us advice about reading on audio as well. She said it is easy to tell when someone is reading and that we should instead practice our lines over and over and get it right that way. She said that when we’re writing we write for reading rather than speaking and there is a big difference in that, this was something to take with us into our media careers.
Overall it was great to receive feedback from our tutor, our peers and a professional Media creator outside of the course and we hope to implement the feedback and improve our media piece!
NOTES FROM CATHERINE’S FEEDBACK 25.5.17
Star Wars Feedback:
- Song too long – 8 seconds of song and make voice come in under the music.
- Thematically connected. Space music and Space toys.
- Spaceship to take out of the music.
- Grab R2 sound and mix with modem sound can cut and overlap.
- Re-record – Telling us what we’re doing rather than doing it.
- Never read – get text and learn lines and say them, learn more lines and read them.
- When you’re reading you write text for reading rather than speaking.
- Turn that into spoken word
- Add more voices
- Have a few takes with different parts
- Providing memory for people and want to keep that going.
- End with heavy breathing at the end.