Brydan Meredith, Project Brief 3 Blogs

Number 1

https://www.mediafactory.org.au/brydan-meredith/2017/04/26/reflection-1-project-brief-3-brydan-meredith/

Number 2

https://www.mediafactory.org.au/brydan-meredith/2017/04/28/project-brief-3-blog-post-2-brydan-meredith/

Project Brief 3 Blog Post 2

In this blog post I am going to reflect on the feedback given to me after I presented a proposal for my world last Thursday. Michelle, a guest assessor, recommended that I watch the British television crime drama Broadchurch in order to inform my current world. I watched the first episode this morning and noted several commonalities between my world and the world of Broadchurch, notably the parochial nature of the town. From the very beginning of the series the Broadchurch writers go to great stress to communicate the insularities of their world.

Oliver, a young journalist, asks his editor why she still employs a lousy, unreliable photographer, the editor replies “I see him at the supermarket every Saturday, we look after our own here”. The lolly shop owner when asked if he knew the murdered 10 year old said “They brought him in here, 3 days old”. The man doing the autopsy on the child states “We don’t get these around here, make sure you find them”.  

Perhaps Broadchurch is like this because (like my world) it is distant from a major city. Michelle thought that the correlation of literal distance and cultural distance in my world was particularly interesting. She noted that it was even more interesting due to the rise of the internet (which has the ability to grant people virtual access to other cultures). This idea has worried me because it presents a contradiction in my world. How can I have a truly insular world when the world has virtual access to mass-culture? I have thought about this and can answer it in two ways. The first is through “being in the world not of the world”: Perhaps the young people of my town who have access to social media dismiss anything not relevant to their town as being insignificant and frivolous. They consider world news as poison. The older people of my town are, by nature, stubborn and set in their old ways. As a consequence, they take a simpler approach, they ignore online media, they refuse to indulge in it.

The second way I discovered through watching Broadchurch. The people of Broadchurch demonstrate a natural scepticism to social media. Just hours after her son had passed away the Mother was disgusted when her daughter received a google alert from the buzzwords “Broadchurch” and “Murder”. Though the implications of social media are daunting for the family, considering it could take away their privacy, at this moment in the story the Mothers outrage was directed at the principal of google alerts as opposed to the un-perceived threat of invaded privacy. This is another demonstration, in the world of fiction, that a physical distance from mass-culture can lead to technological scepticism. Which leads me to think, maybe I don’t need to justify anything? This is how insular cultures operate, through natural scepticism and a conscious ignorance directed at things greater than themselves.

Lastly I will talk about my ‘Fish Out of Water’ protagonist. Lucy (guest assessor #2) as well as my in-class table group thought that a foreign protagonist, one that is at a distance from the world that they have been placed in, is a really effective way for the viewer to be objectively introduced to a world. In Broadchurch the viewer is revealed the world in this manner. Alec (David Tennant) is a man who recently arrived in Broadchurch after a long career in the big city and through his perspective the world of Broadchurch reveals itself.

When I talk about my protagonist to my group they often say ‘How is he going to change the world?’ ‘Is he out there enough to change the world?’ Something I will insist on is that my world cannot be changed, it is an all-consuming world, you’re either a part of it or you’re not. The world is bigger than a solitary individual’s resistance. However, there were two very interesting questions (given to me by my table group) that I will need to explore. ‘Is there something in his history that prevents him from being a part of the culture?’ and secondly ‘Does he tip his toe into the culture and then decide whether he wants to be a part of it or not?’ This last question has the potential to be an interesting point of conflict in my story.

• My plans are, for the end of semester to submit to short films (2-3 minutes long) based in my world and to submit a script of roughly 20 pages.
• Initially I was planning on writing a short story, however it occurred to me that we’re writing screen worlds and that to get the most out of this course I must be focusing on that.
• In the coming days I may adapt some of my earlier prose into little pieces of screenplay, this will be a good starting point for my longer one.
• Filming, at this stage, will be done on March 7, a Sunday at a suburban, bayside beach town. Where I will film my work in progress script, that I attached for PB3 and a script idea that I will write in the coming days. Both scenes will only be snapshots of what life, in my world, will be like.
• Recently I’ve been getting into film photography, attached below are photos I had developed last week after a weekend trip down to Anglesea. Hopefully they capture some of the mood that I will explore in my upcoming media.

Attached is my short screenplay, please see below.

Brydan Meredith_Another World_Draft 3 Another World_Screenplay-pjzx26

Before I talk about where I’m at, I must first talk about where I’ve come from.

In my Project Brief 2 blog posts I wrote of an idyllic, quintessentially Australian, sun drenched town, that served as merely a setting, rather than a world, for my damaged protagonist to roam.

When writing PB2 I was hit with a colonel of an idea, albeit vague, of the type of world I would like to begin to mould.

“I think the relationship between the story world and the characters is strong. The idea (that I just touched on) of my characters being in a relatively flat, dry and unchanging world is something that, now that I’m conscious of it, works quite nicely.” – PB2, Brydan Meredith.

Here I identify a key aspect of my world, that it doesn’t change, but I don’t go on to show the impact that this characteristic has on all the other elements that comprise my world. How do people operate in a stagnant culture as opposed to a progressing one? How does this influence behaviour?

Whilst I was thinking about these ideas I read George Orwell’s ‘Nineteen Eighty-Four’. Orwell, in Nineteen Eighty-Four, presents to the extreme what happens when a society or culture is so insular and self-indulged that it exists purely to reinforce its own image, its own idea of itself.

And what does happen? People operate in uniformity; Independent thought is outlawed and citizens rapidly lose empathy. For me this was a big ‘ahhhh’ moment when thinking about specifying my worlds internal logic and the relationship between my story world and its characters.

My world evolved from being merely a ‘stagnant’ place to having dystopian culture of its own: I changed the geography of my town (it became a town cut off from mass culture due to physical distance), I made the people of my town cruel and un-empathetic, the weather became permanently bitter, physical pleasures (like sex, violence, drugs, alcohol) dictated behaviour and much of its infrastructure became run down due to lack of use. Lastly and most significantly, the people of my world began seeing their world as flawless. They live for the world, for their idea of the world- not for themselves.

Attached is a short screenplay, featuring my original protagonist from Project Brief 2. I initially had this idea about three weeks ago. All I knew at that stage was that my story would begin with a stranger approaching Ryan (my protagonist) whilst he is sitting on the beach and that it would end with Ryan attacking this stranger.

Initially Ryan was going to be the aggressor, the trouble maker, a man looking for cleansing in a rather naturalistic world. In my initial prose, I wrote Ryan as a ‘dark shadow’ trying to rid guilt. However, as I altered my worlds culture, I had to alter my writing appropriately.

I began to imagine Ryan as being to my world what Winston, Nineteen Eighty-Four’s protagonist, is to Orwell’s world. They are both free-thinking individuals that don’t want to conform to the oppressive society in which they live. Ryan switched from being the problem in a forgiving world, to being a sense of hope in a very problematic, cruel world. Ryan, like Winston, is an outsider whose morals don’t align with the ethics of the town.

This ‘world first’ approach completely changed my initial idea. Leon (the stranger), symptomatic of his world, was unforgiving. Ryan was submissive. The roles were completely reversed. There would be no physical altercation at the end. The rules of my world certainly created limitations, I had to change the whole dynamic of the scene, but it ultimately forced me to write something consistent, with its own internal logic, which is not only apparent but a point of interest in the writing.

I focused heavily on pacing when drafting the screenplay; aiming to write a slow scene. I wanted to write a slow scene to represent the stagnant, boring nature of my world. One of my favourite novels, John Updike’s Rabbit Run, does this very well. Rabbit, the protagonist, is trapped in this dry, boring, homogenised American town (Brewer). Updike writes of life in Brewer through long, drawn out passages that encapsulates the towns nature and makes the reader feel trapped just like Rabbit. Through my pacing I want to achieve the same effect as Updike. To tell a quick paced story wouldn’t be true to my world, this doesn’t mean I need to tell a boring story, I simply shouldn’t rush.

Lastly I will write about how my evolving world led me to make stylistic changes in representing Leon. Leon was initially envisioned as a middle-class character, he was to wear chino’s and a designer ski-jacket. Instead, ‘Leon wears baggy, faded jeans and an old Essendon Bombers Jacket. He is smoking a cigarette’. In regards to characterisation Leon channels a hardy stoicism that he previously didn’t have. ‘Leon is smoking a cigarette. The cold wind blows against his face causing him to grimace’. These two minor changes in my character, as a consequence of my world changing, turned Leon from a plain, 2-dimensional character to someone interesting and idiosyncratic.

Shot 1, our protagonist sitting on the beach, looking out at the waves.

Shot 2, he turns to his left and sees a figure coming towards him down the beach. Essentially the same scene of him looking at the waves, is filmed from a different angle.

Shot 3, we see a long shot, of a man wearing rolled up pants on the beach, he is short and stocky, we cant see him clearly. It is a perspective shot from our protagonists point of view.

Shot 4, we cut in to a mid-shot and see this man walk down the beach, he is in full focus. The man stops walking and looks at the protagonist

Shot 5. We get a close up of him looking at the protagonist, he seems hesitant apprehensive.

Shot 6. He leaves the frame and I pull focus on the water.

Shot 7. The camera, stays where it is and pulls around, from the distance we see the two talk. Then we cut in to a front on shot.

Creative Writing Exercise #3

 The Ferris Wheel’s lights shimmer across the darkening bay. The soft, dainty, yellow falls on the calm of the ocean. Teenagers swim amongst the colour, warmness, everything warmness, the water rises and falls softly; dark blue and speckled gold.

Tim places his school bag on the damp grass and sits and looks out across the ocean. There was a lot of darkness on the horizon-but none of it was near. Out on the pier fisherman pack up their rods and frozen fish as young couples kiss under the slowly rising moonlight. Tim was waiting for the stars, but all he could see was one full moon.

Busloads of tourists walk down the beach taking pictures, devouring breath after breath of fresh sea air. They head towards the omniscient neon glow of the miniature golf place, where they will be greeted by a giant, concrete Koala. It’s light blue eyes will pierce through the night sky and the carnival music will ring through the park until the late hours of the evening.

A group of workmen sit on a bench near Tim, they laugh and drink and eat fish and chips. It was the end of a long week and they knew it. For them, there was plenty to laugh about, it was the first time in a long time any of them had money. Tim digs his hand into the sand amongst the soft grass and looks up at the enormous Ferris Wheel. His green eyes water in its presence, the wheel shone light over everyone and everything.

The night ends and time marches on.

____________________________________________

(My intention is to now juxtapose this night, of my town in its prime, with my town in its current decrepit state).

Below I will attach images of the notes I made whilst reading Adam Ganz’s Essay on Lens Based writing. I will also write about the points Ganz makes that stood out to me. I read his essay and made notes a couple of weeks ago, however I’m about to do some creative writing for Pb3, so now is the time to reflect.

• Seperate facts from the implicated meaning of facts: I don’t believe this was a direct quote but its nonetheless something that stood out to me. Often when I write creatively I fall into temptation of trying to hand-feed the audience the meaning (behind what I’m writing). This compromises the creative work in the long run and comes across either as clumsy exposition or heavy handed writing. For example if I want to show a derelict town I should write….The ferris wheel stands next to the pier, its lights cracked and dim. I should not write: The ferris stands next to the pier, a perfect symbol of the now ruined town.
• Often scientists without a literary grasp were the most successful. This relates to subjective writing and clearly conveying imaginative images. No doubt the literate scientists pontificated and wrote using terms and phrasing few could understand. As a creative writer it is necessary not to fall for the same thing, their is no point in writing anything if no one other than yourself can understand it.
• Write what is in front of you, as if the movie is playing in front of you.
• Dialogue isn’t conversation, it is to reveal character and advance conversation.

Below are my notes in the flesh!

Aronson writes “films based on strongly felt themes can be clumsily structured, cliched, people with stereotypes and prone to preachiness”. Aronson is stating that when a theme is too significant in the mind of the writer, the final product can be heavy handed. She suggests that themes are best presented implicitly.

This got me thinking of themes in my world, the main one I came up with is the theme of Progression and Tradition.

Progression Vs Tradition

To begin to explore this theme I must understand the meaning of culture, Google defines Culture as: The ideas, customs, and social behaviour of a particular people or society.

A custom in my culture would be drinking (alcohol), if you don’t drink you’re behaviour (not drinking) isn’t accepted, you are the odd one out.

Social Behaviour: Everything must be done in order to serve and honour the idea of their derelict community. Independent thought is not valued, however acting in a group, following everyone else in the town and obeying their customs is. In the town people litter and spit, this is acceptable social behaviour, however in our own society it isn’t.

Ideas: Any ideas one has consistently links back to the group and doing whats right for the group.

Because the culture hasn’t changed in years (since the industry stopped) people just become set in their ways, which only become more grounded and stable as time goes by. If this world did progress and not stand still, the values I previously described would be replaced by ones cultivated from broader civilisation (the outside world) which would be more refined and make my world more liveable.

This theme of progression vs tradition can be applied to my protagonist because he has the choice to go back home (to his past life) or stay in this  rotting town. He could either change or go back home.

The brain storming below is in regards to the theme ‘Change’

I got some good ideas in regards to how I should depict the people of my world, the first thing I wrote was ‘appearance’ which led me to think that the people of my world will be likely overweight or underweight because they are not eating healthy. This led me to place an abundance of fast food places in my town, like McDonalds, Pizza Hut……

Secondly, something I wrote down after taking a photo of my brainstorming, is the weather, I could use it to symbolise the change in my town, in the past it could be warm, now it is cold.

Lastly, I’d like to show the attitude of the civilians through a metaphor of “Timmy” when Timmy was 7 he could look up at the Ferris Wheel and feel hopeful, now Timmy could be fourteen, out of school and not look up once. I could use this metaphor to describe how much world has changed into what it now is.

In this blog post I will fit my own world into Robert McKee’s writings on setting. I initially did all my work on paper and will attach the photos of my work at the bottom of this post. I found this activity really useful in defining my world, it complimented the class we had the other day where we brainstormed ideas. For me, McKee’s writings and that class really helped me get the ball rolling.

McKee Intro: A stories setting is four dimensional – period, duration, location, level of conflict.

Period: Is the story’s place in time. 

Contemporary Victoria 2017. This period is significant because I want to critique the society in which we live. Contemporary Australian society prides itself on being a culture of free, independent thinkers, but all to often people fall into the trap of believing what society tells them too. What inspired this idea, was the other day at Uni, someone was complaining aggressively about Malcolm Turnbull, I honestly inquired ‘Why don’t you like him?’ And they replied ‘I just don’t’. This encounter led me to question how many opinions do I and others hold that are based off nothing. Society often demonstrates its inability to answer the question ‘Why’. By creating a flaw, collectivist society in 2o17 I can critique this.

Duration: Is the stories length through time

My story will be told in two parts. It concerns itself with two characters who sleep together one Saturday night. I will tell the story of the woman night previous to her meeting the man at the Casino the previous night and the story of the man the morning after. I will explore a relatively small amount of time, maybe two hours each way.

Location: Is the stories physical dimension. It is the stories place in space. 

On the coast far away from any major cities. There is a great physical distance between this town an the city. This leads tot he town being somewhat isolated from mass culture, so instead they create their own.

Once an industrial beach town where trade was going strong and tourism was booming. Some years before my story takes place a new coastal highway is built that by-passes the town. Tourists and workmen stop coming and what is left is the locals, as a consequence of this exit the town becomes insular and self indulged.

It is a regular Australian seaside town: A pier, supermarket, fish and ship store, pub. Just out of town 500 metres down the main stretch lies an old, grey casino, where the locals go every night. This Casino, that plays the same music every night, is the heart of the town. At the very opposite end of the main stretch, near the beach, their is a broken down ferries wheel. Behind the supermarket their is a race track from grey-hounds. The Ferris Wheel and Casino book end the town. Next to the Ferris Wheel their is an unused mini-gold place, all the statues are rotted due to salt, water has destroyed the astro-turf.

Level of Conflict

The People

• Insular
• Dress Similar
• They believe their community is more significant than the individuals that comprise it. You serve the community never yourself. Never put yourself above the greater good of the community. A less extreme version of fight club, 1984, hot fuzz. Its a collectivist culture, but more deeply grounded in reality.
• Drink a lot
• Smoke a lot
• Listen to the same music
• Hate change

VS

The Man from Out of Town

• Wears different clothes
• Isn’t part of the community
• Doesn’t drink or smoke
• Doesn’t value community
• Likes variety
• Doesn’t swear
• Is in conflict with the community
• Will he abide by his own morals or be absorbed by the ethics of the community

VS

The Weather 

• Freezing Cold
• Windy
• Dangerous Surf
• Polluted/Trash everywhere/chip wrappers floating in the creek flowing to the sea.

The Man VS Himself

• He’s come to this town on holiday after getting divorced and needs to decide where to take his life. He could change himself and be absorbed into this collectivist culture to change to change his life or he could stay true to himself in the face of adversity and challenge the society and leave.

POSSIBILITIES AND LIMITATIONS OF THE SETTING

(World Rules)

• The people in my world are bored, “lower class” people. This means they are going to be doing certain activities (not others). They are likely too: Roam the streets looking for fun/action, ride bicycles and scooters, carry around portable speakers listening to bland, tasteless music, stray/untamed dos accompany them. They won’t read books, they will gamble, for them physical/sensual pleasures are the most common.
• Cold, people behave very differently in the cold than they do in the heat.
• No real depth of thought shown by the citizen. Their will be no ‘rogue
  philosopher amongst them, once you’re a part of that society you forfeit a part of yourself. It encompasses you, no exemption from the collectivist culture.